September 25, 2009

AN ITALIAN BOY'S CONFESSION

'Bless me Father, for I have sinned.

I have been with a loose girl'.

The priest asks, 'Is that you, little Joey Pagano ?'

'Yes, Father, it is.'


'And who was the girl you were with?'


'I can't tell you, Father. I don't want to ruin her reputation'.


"Well, Joey, I'm sure to find out her name sooner or later
so you may as well tell me now. Was it Tina Minetti?'


'I cannot say.'


'Was it Teresa Mazzarelli?'


'I'll never tell.'


'Was it Nina Capelli?'


'I'm sorry, but I cannot name her.'


'Was it Cathy Piriano?'


'My lips are sealed.'


'Was it Rosa DiAngelo, then?'


'Please, Father, I cannot tell you.'


The priest sighs in frustration.

'You're very tight lipped, and I admire that.
But you've sinned and have to atone.
You cannot be an altar boy now for 4 months.
Now you go and behave yourself.'


Joey walks back to his pew, and his friend Franco slides over and whispers,

'What'd you get?'



'Four months vacation and five good leads.'

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Quote of the Day

"An enemy at the gates is less formidable, for he is known and carries his banner openly. But the traitor moves amongst those within the gate freely, his sly whispers rustling through all the alleys, heard in the very halls of government itself... A murderer is less to fear." --Marcus Tullius Cicero

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My new GMC truck !!!


I bought a new GMC Sierra and returned to the dealer yesterday because I
couldn't get the radio to work.
The salesman explained that the radio was voice activated.


'Nelson,' the salesman said to the radio.The radio replied, 'Ricky or
Willie?' 'Willie!' he continued and 'On The Road Again' came from the
speakers.

Then he said, 'Ray Charles!', and in an instant ' Georgia On My Mind'
replaced Willie Nelson.

I drove away happy, and for the next few days, every time I'd say, 'Beethoven,' I'd get beautiful
classical music, and if I said, 'Beatles,' I'd get one of their awesome songs.

Yesterday, some guys ran a red light and nearly creamed my new truck, but I swerved in
time to avoid them. I yelled, 'Ass Holes! '

There was a short pitch on National Health Care by Obama, immediately followed by the Iranian
National Anthem, sung by Jane Fonda and Barbra Streisand, backed up by Michael Moore and The Dixie
Chicks, with John Kerry on guitar, Al Gore on drums, Dan Rather on harmonica, Nancy Pelosi on
tambourine, Harry Reid on spoons, Bill Clinton on sax and Ted Kennedy On Scotch.

Damn, I LOVE this truck!

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September 23, 2009

Quote of the Day

"If you ever injected truth into politics, you would have no politics." -- Will Rogers (1879-1935)

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September 22, 2009

'Nough said

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H/T to LC Cheapshot

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September 21, 2009

And then the fight started!

My wife sat down on the settee next to me as I was flipping channels. She asked, 'What's on TV?'

I said, 'Dust.'

And then the fight started...
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My wife and I were watching "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire" while we were in bed. I turned to her and said, "Do you want to have sex?"

"No," she answered.

I then said, "Is that your final answer?"

She didn't even look at me this time, simply saying, "Yes."

So I said, "Then I'd like to phone a friend."

And then the fight started....
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Saturday morning I got up early, quietly dressed, made my lunch, and slipped quietly into the garage. I hooked up the boat up to the van, and proceeded to back out into a torrential downpour. The wind was blowing 50 mph, so I pulled back into the garage, turned on the radio, and discovered that the weather would be bad all day.

I went back into the house, quietly undressed, and slipped back into bed. I cuddled up to my wife's back, now with a different anticipation, and whispered, "The weather out there is terrible."

My loving wife of 5 years replied, "Can you believe my stupid husband is out fishing in that?"

And that's how the fight started...
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I rear-ended a car this morning. So, there we were alongside the road and slowly the other driver got out of his car. You know how sometimes you just get soooo stressed and little things just seem funny? Yeah, well I couldn't believe it.... He was a DWARF!!! He stormed over to my car, looked up at me, and shouted, "I AM NOT HAPPY!!!"

So, I looked down at him and said, "Well, then which one are you?"

And then the fight started.....
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My wife was hinting about what she wanted for our upcoming anniversary. She said, 'I want something shiny that goes from 0 to 150 in about 3 seconds.'

I bought her a bathroom scale.

And then the fight started...
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When I got home last night, my wife demanded that I take her some place expensive... so, I took her to a petrol station.

And then the fight started...
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After retiring, I went to the Social Security office to apply for Social Security. The woman behind the counter asked me for my driver's License to verify my age. I looked in my pockets and realized I had left my wallet at home. I told the woman that I was very sorry, but I would have to go home and come back later.

The woman said, 'Unbutton your shirt'. So I opened my shirt revealing my curly silver hair. She said, 'That silver hair on your chest is proof enough for me' and she processed my Social Security application.

When I got home, I excitedly told my wife about my experience at the Social Security office.

She said, 'You should have dropped your pants. You might have gotten disability, too.'

And then the fight started...
******************************************


My wife and I were sitting at a table at my school reunion, and I kept staring at a drunken lady swigging her drink as she sat alone at a nearby table.

My wife asked, 'Do you know her?'

'Yes,' I sighed, 'She's my old girlfriend. I understand she took to drinking right after we split up those many years ago, and I hear she hasn't been sober since.'

'My God!' says my wife, 'who would think a person could go on celebrating that long?'

And then the fight started...
******************************************


I took my wife to a restaurant. The waiter, for some reason took my order first. "I'll have the steak, medium rare, please."

He said, "Aren't you worried about the mad cow?""

Nah, she can order for herself."

And then the fight started...
******************************************


A woman was standing nude, looking in the bedroom mirror. She was not happy with what she saw and said to her husband, "I feel horrible; I look old, fat and ugly.. I really need you to pay me a compliment.'

The husband replied, 'Your eyesight's damn near perfect.'

And then the fight started!


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September 18, 2009

National POW/MIA Recognition Day

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Today I rode my 16th Mission with the Indiana Patriot Guard Riders. The mission was to stand a flag line in honor of the 1,741 men and women still on the POW/MIA list from the Vietnam War.

This day was first recognized on July 18, 1979. National POW-MIA Recognition Day legislation was introduced yearly until 1996 when it was deemed by Congress that legislation designating special commemorative days would no longer be considered by Congress. The President now signs a proclamation every year.

The National League of Families proposed that the third Friday in September be the designated date in the future, due to the fact that that date is no associated with any particular war, so that former POW's -MIA's, KIA's and veterans of ALL wars can be remembered and honored for their sacrifices.

I really felt honored to be able to participate in this solemn ceremony. The ships bell of the U.S.S. Indianapolis was rung five times for each of the Armed Services as a wreath was laid to honor that Service's lost/missing members. That bell rang loud and proud, and there was more than one tearful eye in the crowd.
When the Black Hawk (GO ARMY!) flyover flew over the assembled dignitaries to signal the conclusion of the ceremony, it couldn't help but make one one feel proud to have been a part of the proceedings, in however small a way.

I intend to participate every year in this mission, until every last one of our Men and Women are accounted for.
I hope you will join us.

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Not A Moment Too Soon...

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R.I.P. ACORN

Finally, Congress might be actually be responding to corruption in a political organization.

Take note of the 75 that voted to keep to "business as usual" and remember them in the next election..

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WTF?

Teh WON wants to negotiate with a fanatic like this?!?

When even the Old Grey Lady prints the truth about such a wacko as Ahmadinejad, when they are generally apologists for dictators of every stripe, you KNOW you're on the fringe when you seriously try to negotiate with such extremists.

Seems that in his Hopey-Changetude world, Obambi is willing to risk our allies to appease the rabid dog heading up Iran.

Let's see...appeasing enemies inimical to our way of life by exposing our allies to nuclear blackmail...yep, really fine strategic thinking there!
It's like throwing your brother in front of an attacking hungry bear in the hope that he'll be satisfied with that meal and not come after you...

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September 17, 2009

RIDDLE


What's the difference between the Houston Zoo and the White House?


The Zoo has an African Lion...
The White House has a Lyin' African...

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September 16, 2009

Quote of the Day

“A government big enough to give you everything you want, is strong enough to take everything you have". -- Thomas Jefferson

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September 13, 2009

Quote of the Day

Even if you're on the right track, you'll get run over if you just sit there.
-- Will Rogers (1879-1935)

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September 11, 2009

9-11 Remembered

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Today is the 8Th anniversary of one of the most tragic days in our Nations life. It should be a day to remember those that died and those heroes that risked their lives in the aftermath of the single most heinous crime yet committed in the 21St Century. Mr. Obama, in a blatantly obvious way, wants to re-brand the day into a "National Day of Service"....of course isn't that the focus of all public events for a Socialist ? I have no problem with having a National Day of Service..say on 9/12, or 9/10. I just object taking what should be a day of memorials and mourning to one of "what can YOU do for the State today?" We can celebrate service to our fellow Citizens on any day, but is just isn't appropriate on this day of all days, 9/11; that Mr. Obama would try to refocus attention to his own agenda is a sign of his overweening hubris, and the contempt he feels for the average American citizen.

Just as the hue and cry went up after Dec. 7, 1941; we should NEVER. FORGET what happened on that sunny morning in September 11, 2001, in New York at the Twin Towers,

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in Washington at the Pentagon,

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and, most especially, in a farmer's field in Pennsylvania.

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Fly your flags, say a prayer for the fallen, remind your neighbors and teach your children what happened on this date, but most of all:


NEVER FORGET


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September 10, 2009

Yes,but

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Oh Yeah...


A U.S. Marine squad was marching north of Fallujah when they came upon an Iraqi terrorist, badly injured and unconscious. On the opposite side of the road was an American Marine in a similar but less serious state. The Marine was conscious and alert and as first aid was given to both men, the squad leader asked the injured Marine what had happened.


The Marine reported, "I was heavily armed and moving north along the highway here, and coming south was a heavily armed insurgent. We saw each other and both took cover in the ditches along the road. I yelled to him that Saddam Hussein was a miserable, lowlife scum bag who got what he deserved, and he yelled back that Ted Kennedy is a fat, good-for-nothing, left wing liberal drunk who doesn't know how to drive. So I said that Osama Bin Laden dresses and acts like a frigid, mean-spirited lesbian! He retaliated by yelling, "Oh yeah? Well, so does Nancy Pelosi!"


"And, there we were, in the middle of the road, shaking hands, when a truck hit us."

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September 07, 2009

IS BHO Kenyan?

With a court hearing scheduled for tomorrow, Lucas Smith, the owner of a certified copy of a Kenyan birth certificate purported to belong to one Barrack Hussein Obama, has testified, under threat of perjury, that said document is the true birth certificate of pResident Obama. Will it stand up to scrutiny? I have no idea.

I DO find it telling, however, that Mr. Obama has still refused to release his long-form Hawaiian Birth Certificate....or ANY other personal record, for that matter.

I don't want to believe that even the DNC would be so lax as to allow a Constitutionally unqualified person to run, much allow him to be seated as POTUS. While Mr. Obama seems to regard the issue as a matter of his personal privacy, it behooves ANYONE who aspires to be the Chief Executive of this country to be as open as possible to the People in his past activities and associations, not to mention his BASIC qualifications. I can't get a job as a delivery truck driver without my past being reviewed, to include a birth certificate; the office of POTUS should require at least as stringent a review, shouldn't it?

With a scheduled hearing date Tuesday, Lucas Smith, the man who tried to sell an alleged Barack Obama Kenyan birth certificate on eBay, has filed court papers in a high-profile eligibility case insisting – under threat of perjury – that the Obama birth certificate in his possession is the genuine article. (emp. mine D)

Smith filed his affidavit through California attorney Orly Taitz, who has spearheaded several lawsuits challenging Barack Obama's constitutional eligibility to serve as president.

Taitz posted on her blog Smith's declaration, which claims he obtained the alleged birth certificate from Coast General Hospital in Mombasa, Kenya, and insists it's real.

"The true and correct photocopy of the birth certificate obtained is attached to this affidavit as Exhibit A," the declaration reads. "I declare, certify, verify, state and affirm under penalty of perjury under the laws of the United States of America that the foregoing statements of fact and descriptions of circumstances and events are true and correct."

Smith's affidavit, which includes a copy of the certificate, has been filed with Judge David Carter of the U.S. District Court for the Central District of California. Carter is scheduled to preside over a hearing on the case on Sept. 8.

Taitz stated she believes the swiftly approaching court date prompted Smith into action:"He has been in touch with me for quite a while, and he emailed me the document with his signature," Taitz said. "I think he was trying to figure out the most expedient way to bring his message public, and maybe he felt that because I have a hearing coming, that would be the most expedient way."

Taitz hopes the court will order expedited discovery, a ruling that would open many of Obama's currently sealed documents, including his college records and Hawaiian long-form birth certificate, to court scrutiny.

"We'll see what happens on Tuesday. If Judge Carter has the guts, we may move very fast," Taitz told WND. "If expedited discovery is ordered, I'll be dashing to Occidental College and then be on a flight to Hawaii."

In his filing, Smith declares that he traveled to Kenya in February and paid off a military officer in order to obtain a copy of the birth certificate from Coast General Hospital in Mombasa. The declaration also states that the hospital administrator signed and sealed the copy, which indicates Obama's birth in Africa on Aug. 4, 1961, at 7:24 p.m.

Mr Smith's reputation is such that it does bring serious questions about the documents authenticity, but as he puts it:"It took a guy like me to go and get tangible proof about Obama. I don't mind breaking a few laws or policies here and there. I don't mind paying the military in foreign countries to look the other way ... The military [in Africa] will grant you access to anything for just a few dollars. People are starving. So yes, it takes a guy like me to get things done once in a while."

I DON'T want to be a "Birther"; conspiracy theories generally leave me unimpressed by their adherent's common sense generally and intelligence specifically. Having said that, it still has to give one pause when you consider that:

A. IF Mr. Smith is a fraud, it will easily be found out, and the consequences will not be good for Mr. Smith. (the general perjury statute under Federal law provides for a prison sentence of up to five years)

B. Mr. Smith no longer has any monetary gain to be made on his insistence that the document is genuine; it's been released into the public domain now, so he can't sell it for profit as he originally intended.

C. pResident Obama could easily refute this claim by releasing his Hawaiian Birth Certificate and other records.

Now ask yourself, WHY would a person risk five years in Federal Prison for no personal gain; while the person under investigation is concurrently expending hundreds of thousands of dollars and attorney man hours by 11 different law firms to keep the requested information from public view?

Admittedly, maybe Mr. Smith just wants notoriety, but five years in prison seems a large price to pay for 15 minutes of fame...
You don't have to be a conspiracy theorist to smell the smoke of a huge fire, or a large rat lurking in the dark recesses of the White House .


The document below is alleged by Lucas Smith to be Barack Obama's original, authentic birth certificate from Kenya. Judge for yourself. I believe it warrants at least a closer examination of the qualifications of the man who would be our Leader.
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The Marine

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We all came together,
Both young and old
To fight for our freedom,
To stand and be bold.

In the midst of all evil,
We stand our ground,
And we protect our country
From all terror around.

Peace and not war,
Is what some people say.
But I'll give my life,
So you can live the American way

To talk of your peace.
To stand in your groups,
and protest in our streets.

But still I fight on,
I don't fuss, I don't whine.
I'm just one of the people!
Who is doing your time.

I'm harder than nails,
Stronger than any machine.
I'm the immortal soldier,
I'm a U.S. MARINE!

So stand in my shoes,
And leave from your home.
Fight for the people who hate you,
With the protests they've shown.
Fight for the stranger,
Fight for the young.
So they all may have,
The greatest freedom you've won

Fight for the sick,
Fight for the poor
Fight for the cripple,
Who lives next door.

But when your time comes,
Do what I've done.
For if you stand up for freedom,
You'll stand when the fight's done

By: Corporal Aaron M. Gilbert, US Marine Corps
USS SAIPAN, PERSIAN GULF


.... FREEDOM isn't FREE Someone pays for you and me.

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September 02, 2009

Whittle Speaks

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A truly exceptional video about exceptionalism, by the great Bill Whittle.

Mr. Whittle breaks it down to show just how exceptional the United States of America truly is, and refutes every major talking point of the Left on their accusations of how we are "an Imperialist Empire", or "we rob our wealth from the poorer nations", or "we are a nation of stupid people". (I've often wondered how we can rob so many nations of their wealth by being a stupid people -- that statement seems counter-intuitive to me..., as far as Empire goes; I was born in a country totally devastated and decimated by WW2, if not for the U.S., it would still be at least a second world type of situation there; instead it's thriving, and due in large part to the generosity of the American people combined with the great work ethic of the Dutch people {point of pride for me here, Holland was the ONLY country to have totally repaid it's war debt to the U.S.})

H/T to Misha

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Jesse Jackson's Newest Staff Member

You can't make up stuff better than this!

Isn't politics grand?

HURRAH FOR THE DEMOCRATS!

Jesse Jackson's Newest Staff Member
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Mel Reynolds

Jesse Jackson has added former Chicago Democrat

Congressman Mel to Rainbow/PUSH Coalition's payroll.

Reynolds was among the 176 criminals excused

in President Clinton's
last-minute forgiveness spree.

Reynolds received a commutation of his six-and-a-half-year
federal sentence for 15 convictions of wire fraud, bank fraud,

and lies to the Federal Election Commission.

He is more notorious, however, for concurrently serving

five years for sleeping with an underage campaign volunteer.

This is a first in American politics: An ex-congressman who had

sex with a subordinate...won clemency from a president who had

sex with a subordinate...then was hired by a clergyman who had

sex with a subordinate!

His new job?

Ready for this??









***** YOUTH COUNSELOR *****

IS THIS A GREAT COUNTRY OR WHAT?

CONFIRMED BY:

http://www.snopes.com/politics/sexuality/reynolds.asp

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September 01, 2009

Quote of the Day

"No law ever written has stopped any robber, rapist or killer, like cold blue steel in the hands of their last intended victim." --W. Emerson Wright

And that's exactly what it all comes down to; in the end we are all responsible for our own defense, and the moment we forget that basic fact of life is the moment we become subject to any number of other fallacious tenets.

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